
Leadership & Self Confidence,
September 2010


 Future Features
October 2010 Communication, Relationships
November 2010Burning Desire vs Negative Emotions
December 2010Reflection
Setting The scene
Moving forward Back to Top
Inspirational Quotation
“You must know that in any moment a decision you make can change the course of your life forever: the very next person behind you in line, or seated next to you in an airplane, the very next phone call you make or receive, the very next movie you see or book you read or page you turn, could be the one single thing that causes the floodgates to open, and all of the things that you’ve been waiting for, to fall into place.”

Sponsored Workshops Abundance Retreat - Being beyond Technique Resolution for Life - Margit Jones-Hochstrasser, Assoc. Destination Coach IC International Ltd - Aileen A Gibb, Assoc. Dramatherapy Group Know Limits Ltd. - Mandy Gutsell, Assoc. Give Yourself the Gift of Health Rainbow Promise Health - Dawn Campbell, Assoc.(corp) Start up - 20K Money Making System study – PaTrisha-Anne, FAC. Post Graduate Certificate in Emotional Intelligence Coaching Measures for Success - David Payne, APC. Psychological and Physical Effects of Trauma NRAH - Tricia Reeves, Assoc. Transformational Breathing Resolution for Life - Margit Jones-Hochstrasser, Assoc. View all of our Sponsored Workshops and further details here. Back to Top
Positive Daily Action
Getting on track to take bold action is the only way forward in your journey to success.
Impact your life and decide to take consistent action which is critical to move forward one step at a time.
There are of course many dynamics that come into play including putting the horse in front of the cart, without doing that you are creating a recipe for disaster, so figure out what you want to achieve on a daily basis and then take the appropriate action to get that done.
You’ll be pleased with the outcome.
COMING SOON
Live Top Tips on the IIC Social Media Network...
P.S. I would love to know how you operate your PDA, dowrite to me at the IIC and share. Back to Top
Acronym
PGP Personal Growth Plan
The PGP is all about having made a decision to change the circumstances of your life to evolve and leap to a whole new level of living – a quantum leap and all that it takes is a PGP.
Back to Top
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 Editors Letter  Dear Subscribers
Gentle rain has been showering the landscape of England
yet many tourists have with confidence visited our fair
isle, that says a lot. Sadly though the monsoon rains have
devastated Pakistan, our heartfelt prays and thoughts go
out to those many
millions affected and all of us at the IIC would like to
encourage everyone who can to donate what they can to the
various official funds set up within your local community.
August and September are generally quiet
months for me as I take those weeks to relax and enjoy the
fruit of my own labour, therefore as I am away this months’
newsletter will be shorter than usual.
Driven to succeed is a common thread that runs through society
with entrepreneurism taking a firm hold in the world. Going
for it as some say is made up of incremental steps that
build and take a stand for themselves as the fruits of one’s
endeavours in carrying out a business. Both self confidence
and leadership is required to make success happen and to
get paid. Read the articles within this months’ newsletter
to add a few nuggets of confidence and leadership to your
coaching business.
Our guest this month is Edna Murdoch an Executive Coach
and Director of the Coaching Supervision Academy her article
on Supervision is in the ‘A Day In The Life of...’
section below, read and enjoy.
Remember to visit the IIC web site, the IIC Social Media
networks and our very own You Tube Channel regularly to keep
yourself updated on what is happening and the learning programmes
we have on offer. Share the IIC with your friends and colleagues,
you‘ll be glad you did.
By the way, I’m collating articles for 2011, if you
liked to contribute, share your knowledge and raise your
coaching profile then please write to me directly at the
IIC with your ideas.
Yours in Coaching, PaTrisha-Anne Todd, LCSi, AFC Newsletter Editor Back to Top

Coaching in any niche i.e. life coaching, business
coaching, soul coaching, with or without NLP (neuro linguistic
programming) requires a first class foundational training
in order to build the confidence levels of the coach.
Self confidence is a skill set that can be harnessed,
developed and used to assist coaching clients to reach
and grow their inner potential creating unstoppable action
and leadership qualities. Self confidence is a prerequisite
to success. Self confidence leads to automatic leadership.
Living a life free from fear, anxiety and worry
takes away any feelings of insecurity, self criticism,
concern that others may not like you and putting other
people’s needs ahead of your own is possible. Learning
to cope with your emotions and get a firm productive grip
on them so you can handle them better happens when you
stop over thinking and start taken action to change your
thinking process in a positive stream.
Working with clients as part of your coaching remit is
to convey a sense of confidence and empowerment that goals
and lifestyle can be changed. Coaching tools assist us
to do this.
The Soul of Self Confidence and Leadership
I strongly believe that happiness, joy and contentment
come from a place of inner understanding and strength.
The soul is a powerful store house for knowledge on how
to raise your self esteem, eliminate negative thoughts,
strengthen and feed your motivation, enlightenment and
show direction.
Dispel Negative Thinking
Polar opposites are positive and negative thinking. The
negative self talk that goes on about ourselves can often
lead to an incorrect projected illusion about ourselves
and confidence and personal leadership are overtaken by
time wasting thoughts and actions, or in many cases non-action.
Breaking the cycle of a negative reality requires determined
effort to put into place new healthy positive based thoughts
and actions. In essence look for your good, look to your
dreams, acknowledge your strengths and step by step move
in the direction of raising your levels of self confidence
and personal leadership. Actually step up and challenge
your coach (you do have a coach, don’t you?), to
work with you to find, feed and grow your self confidence
and personal leadership qualities.
Top Tip - Go Get It Done
Getting it done can be simple and quick also fun to
do.
To get your coaching message out to the world involves
having a realistic plan. I find using 3x5 index cards
to plot my way through my thoughts and ideas is quick
and a great tool for organisation, reflection and review.
I use one card for one idea/thought. I simply write down
my thoughts including the date onto the card and file
it way in an index card box under main headings.
When I’m ready to take an action step to get it
done I organise my cards into relevant main and sub headings.
Once all the information is sorted I then transfer it
to a spread sheet on my computer.
Using the system above I can get it done and have fun
doing it.
 Your Questions Answered
Do you have a question about coaching and running your business? Why not let our experts at the IIC answer them for you…
Leadership
What is good leadership? What qualities does a good leader possess? In his
book ‘Tribes – We Need You To Lead Us’
Seth Godin states “leadership is about creating
change that you believe in”.
We all know individuals who inspire us to take action.
What is it about that person that makes us believe in
what they represent to such an extent that we follow their
lead? Whoever it is that inspires you, is encouraging
you to take actions that you believe in taking, and you
have faith in the outcome that those changes will bring.
The messages given by that person resonate with your beliefs
and attitudes and encourage you to follow their example.
As a result you develop and enjoy new experiences and
personal growth.
Leaders don’t always know the outcome their actions
will create, but they start from their own passion to
create change and make improvements. They possess the
drive and determination to persevere through every challenge
and set back. Great leaders such as Martin Luther King
(1929-1968), Mohandas Ghandi (1869-1948) or Mother Theresa
(1910-1997), certainly didn’t know how their actions
would affect so many when they started. They simply had
a passion to change the current situation and ceaselessly
took action to create that momentum for change.
We know as coaches that each of us has the power to be
the leader in our own lives. We coach individuals and
groups to take responsibility for their progress and outcomes,
and build action plans which are congruent with their
values. We encourage them to lead by example by taking
control, overcoming challenges and consistently work on
steps to achieve their goals. One of the fundamental purposes
of employing a coach is so that you are accountable for
consistent action, whether it be large or small steps.
Continual proactive choices to move towards an identified
goal is the way to achieve success.
This is not always as easy as it sounds. Not everyone
is willing to commit to change. Making changes can be
very uncomfortable, it alters the status quo and can create
fear and uncertainty of whether they will bring the results
desired. This is when the support of a coach can also
be extremely beneficial. Leaders break boundaries, stretch
current thinking, lead by example – all qualities
possessed in each of us and skills we can use in our own
personal lives.
Seth Godin also states “Leadership is a choice.
It’s the choice to not do nothing.” We all
have the choice to act, to improve our lives, to make
positive changes and inspire others to do the same. It
therefore follows that we all the the potential to be
leaders. None of us can foresee the outcome our actions
will bring, but unless we take the first step we will
never know what positive changes we can create, or how
they will inspire others.
Reference:
Godin Seth 2008 Tribes – We Need You To Lead Us
Researched and written by Helen Jones, Assoc. ©2010 Helen Jones; All Rights Reserved
 Self-Confidence
"You gain strength, courage,
and confidence by every experience in which you really
stop to look fear in the face.. . . You must do the thing
you think you cannot do." Eleanor Roosevelt, Former
US First Lady (1884-1962)
One of the quickest ways to improve your self-confidence
is to do that thing which you dread most. Even by taking
baby steps to undertake something which fills you with
horror is enormous progress. The first step is always
the hardest but as soon as you have taken that one your
confidence will automatically grow and momentum will encourage
you to continue. If you have a difficult task to do, do
it first thing. Get it over with and you will feel much
freer. The longer you leave something that makes you feel
uncomfortable to more of a mental burden it will become.
Each of us knows areas of our lives where our performance
could be improved but we shirk away from because the actions
that are required make us feel uncomfortable or unsure.
Fear is perhaps the greatest force which stops us reaching
our full potential but we can chip away at it so that
the power it has over us is consistently reduced.
Interestingly an acronym of FEAR is False
Expectations Assuming
Reality. This means that fear is based
on the worry of actually experiencing the worst outcomes
we imagine to happen from the efforts
we put in to achieving the goal. How many times in the
past has your worst fears surrounding an experience actually
occurred? If the outcome was not quite what you had hoped
for, was it really as bad as you had previously imagined?
Perhaps you could ask yourself, what exactly are you afraid
of? Voicing the exact fear, again reduces the power it
has and when you hear it out loud you will often realise
that is not so justified.
If improving your self-confidence is one of your desires,
set it as a conscious goal, just like any other goal you
may set yourself. Here are some tips which can help:
- Identify particular actions which you know will
contribute to increasing greater confidence. Break
down the actions into realistic steps which you will
achieve. If a step feels too big, break it down into
smaller ones.
- Set concrete deadlines to achieve each step by.
This is extremely important as building self-confidence
involves steps which will be very uncomfortable and
the urge to avoid them or make excuses may be greater
than when working on other goals.
- Take time to think about exactly what aspect of
each action causes anxiety or fear. Acknowledge those
feelings, understand that they are coming from a positive
place of self-preservation and embrace your decision
to take the necessary step anyway.
- Celebrate EVERY step. Developing greater self-confidence
involves a great deal of courage and it is important
that you recognise that fact. You have broken a barrier
which had previously held a great power over you and
that is a massive achievement. Enjoy the feeling that
overcoming that hurdle brings.
- Now that you have taken that step, consider the
outcome. Was your worst fear realised? Perhaps the
outcome was not exactly how you would have wished
but you have certainly learnt a great deal which you
can use to improve your performance next time, and
knowing you have completed that action once gives
you more confidence to undertake it again in the future.
- The biggest obstacle to improving your self-confidence
is you. An integral part of continual self-development
is stretching yourself and embracing new challenges.
Once you get used to overcoming smaller challenges
you will know the best methods to support you in taking
on larger ones, and when you have learned this there
is absolutely no reason why you cannot achieve anything
you want to.
Written by Helen Jones, Assoc, Email Helen Jones©2010 Helen Jones; All Rights Reserved
IIC Member Benefit Spotlight: ICR  The International Coaching Register is for any individual who trades as a Coach, who help individuals and/or organisations for example, establish a work life balance, manage stress levels and build communication skills amongst many other specialist areas. Everyone who has qualified as a Coach with a recognised Coach training company should now take the opportunity to register. This will dramatically cut down on any misrepresentation that goes on within the industry. Many people have websites and call themselves a Coach but have no actual qualifications. The register will stop these people and raise the profile of genuine Coaching and how it can transform people’s lives. President of the IIC Gerard O’Donovan said “the register has been administered by the IIC for the benefit of the world of Coaching and Coaching clients. It is also a great way for Coaches to get business as members of the public can search for registered Coaches in their area. It brings Coaching transparency at last.” As a Member of the IIC, Have you published your details on the International Coaching Register, at no charge? To do so: Login to the IIC Members Area, and then select the ICR Register Edits menu option on the left hand side of the screen.
Create your entry by selecting:
Insurance - enter your Professional Indemnity Insurance details here.
Training - enter the details of all the training courses you have completed here.
Workshops - enter the details of all the workshops you have attended here.
Accreditation - your IIC Accreditation details will automatically be included here. You also have the opportunity to enter the details of all the accreditations/credentials you have been awarded, as an independent verification of your Coach training and experience.
Business Details - select or enter all types of Coaching you include in your Coaching Business/Practice.
Organisation Membership Details - enter the details of all Business Organisations in which you hold a Membership -these could be other Coaching Bodies, Chamber of Commerce, or any type of organisation that is appropriate to your business.
Display - do not forget to DISPLAY your details.Selecting yes your details will be displayed on the International Coaching Register. For IIC Accredited Coaches, your details will also be displayed on the IICs Coaching Referral programme. |
We look forward to seeing you on the International Coaching Register.
 A Day in the Life…
‘Supervision is an opportunity to bring someone
home to their own mind, to show them how good they can
be’. Nancy Kline
One of the most important attributes of successful coaches
is self-confidence showing up as genuinely confident
in their craft, coach elegantly and really make an impact.
What Is Coaching Supervision?
Coaching supervision can bring to your practice a learning
edge that develops presence, increases the range of
interventions and builds confidence to coach in many
different contexts. It can make a difference leaving
coaches with a SUPER-VISION of their practice and the
means to optimise their skills.
Supervision offers a collaborative learning partnership
in which Reflection, Insight and Support are key components.
Here are some areas which supervision illuminates:
Establishing contracts, including the often-ignored
psychological contract.
Exploring critical moments in Coaching
Ensuring that ethics and standards are sustained
Exploring blind spots – we all have them!
Building the Internal Supervisor
Developing Systemic thinking
Developing relational awareness.
Offering in-depth support when working with ‘difficult
clients’.
Example: A fairly typical ‘critical moment’
in coaching can occur when a coach processes a 360-feedback
report with a coachee, which has hard-hitting comments.
Sometimes, the coachee puts up a very strong defence
against the comments. Supervision can support the coach
so that they are not caught in parallel process becoming
defensive in their turn and can enable the coach to
be curious about the coachee’s behaviour, rather
than disabled by it. Or the coachee may become emotional
and thus affect the coach’s thinking. Here, supervision
provides a safe, reflective space where the coach can
explore their responses to strong emotion so that they
return to that coachee better resourced and more grounded.
What is the Internal Supervisor?
Building the Internal Supervisor in supervision sessions
means that coaches will have immediate access to the
cognitive, somatic and intuitive data that naturally
occurs inside the coach during coaching conversations.
This valuable information is often ignored. This range
of information becomes available to the coach’s
analytical/processing mind, which in turn decides interventions
and strategies. With a well-developed Internal Supervisor,
comes a major increase in coaches’ confidence,
coaching presence and powerful, impactful coaching.
Coaching Supervision greatly accelerates the development
of the Internal Supervisor by working directly with
the coach’s internal system:
intuition, body responses, hunches, thinking and awareness
of the energetic exchange between client and coach.
This ‘energetic exchange’ can also be understood
as transference/countertransference and is explored
as part of the dance between coach and coachee. By paying
attention to these various types of information, the
coach’s blind spots are removed, and there is
much greater knowledge about the coaching relationship
and of the coaching process - where the main insights
and shifts often occur. Coaches learn how to use these
insights to accelerate change.
Developing the ability to think systemically
is an important part of the supervisory process. The
coach learns more about the interplay between self
and the whole system – eg all stakeholders.
The result is the creation of effective, robust working
alliances and an increase in the ability to keeping
professional boundaries.
The ‘Support’ of supervision
is enormously valuable
Coaches in supervision often refer to the relief of
having time and space to reflect with a trained supervisor
who will microscopically explore practice with them
and contribute to their understanding. This support
enables the coach to contain and resolve some of the
more challenging parts of their work e.g. their frustrations
with coachees, their concern that they are not doing
enough, the difficulty of keeping to a coaching contract
when the coaching ‘flow’ is going off
piste, the undue influence of key stakeholders which
might reduce coach effectiveness, unexpected emotional
material either within the coach or in the coachee
and ‘ruptures’ in the coaching relationship.
Coaching supervision enables coaches to be present
and open, creative and empowered in a field that may
contain ambiguity, complexity and that is often multi-layered.
This level of reflection goes a long way to increasing
coaches’ range and confidence.
Edna Murdoch is an Executive Coach
and Director of the Coaching Supervision Academy.
She runs a 9-month, Coach Supervision training programme
in London, offers supervision to Executive and Internal
coaches, individually and in groups. Her forthcoming
presentation at the EMCC conference in Dublin is entitled:
“Who You Are is How You Coach.”
Full information may be found at: www.coachingsupervisionacademy.com
 Recommended Reading
Links to books available through
amazon.com that were published by our members,
as well as any other books which we find particularly
helpful for coaching ideas and insights will be
placed here. Cheers to reading!
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Newsletter TeamEditor - Dr PaTrisha-Anne Todd, LCSi, AFC; Article contributor - Helen Jones, Assoc;
Webmaster
- John Dee, Assoc. Invitation - join our team and spread the word of professional Coaching! Email PaTrisha-Anne ToddReaders Feedback This is your industry related e-newsletter so have your say here.We would appreciate your feedback on this newsletter, and your contributions to future newsletters. Each month my team and I look forward to your feedback. Feedback is such a powerful and helpful tool, so we want to hear from you. We look forward to hearing you voice an opinion, starting a debate or just raising an issue with us. Send your submissions in the first instance to Newsletter Editor; Email PaTrisha-Anne Todd. CopyrightArticles and illustrations remain the copyright © of the originator; reproduction in any form is prohibited without their written permission. All other material is copyright © of the IIC 1999-2010. All Rights Reserved. DisclaimerThe opinions and the views expressed in the IIC's newsletter are those of the individual authors or contributors and are not necessarily those of the Editor or of the IIC. The IIC assume no liability for accuracy,errors or omissions in editorial or offer content.No advice or information given by contributors, the IIC or any other party shall create any warranty or liability. The IIC cannot accept any responsibility for any loss or damage that may arise as a result of any errors, omissions or inaccuracies in this newsletter.

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