How many times do you analyse what drives you?

Research has shown that there are two basic driving forces that make us do things. The first is DESIRE, because we know what we want, we actively set out to achieve our goals.  The second is AVOIDANCE, because we don't want to suffer the consequences of not doing something.

Sadly, most of us, through watching and learning from others in society have learned to live by the second.

When making decisions, it is important to consider the consequences of not doing something.   However, if we find that our driving force is avoiding pain, then it may be time to have a rethink.

This would also make a good tip of the month - stop right now if you have time and think about why you do the things that you do.  Is it because you want to, or because you have to?  Exploring which tactic serves you best could ensure you live a happier life! 

June's Newsletter takes another look at the ongoing subject of Goals and Goal Setting - the foundations of the Coaching process.

The ECI continually strives to improve standards, raise awareness and seek recognition for Coaching as a profession before we have to react to any 'knee-jerk' reactions from Brussels.  That's why it is vital that we all take responsibility for encouraging others to support The ECI by joining.

Please remember to forward this newsletter to everyone that you think may be interested.  We thank you for your continued support. 

We welcome the return of Dawn Campbell who will step into the role of Editor, a warm welcome back and good luck.

Coaching Research

Coaching Resources required

• What don't you want in your life? At work? At home? If you take the opposite of these, then you have got a list of goals.
• Instead of saying goals, say results. What results do you want from your life? Does changing that one word make a difference? For some of us it makes a big difference! Make a list!
• Suppose you had all your concerns met. Imagine this now. What would you be doing in your life which is different from what you are doing now? Write these down as your list of goals, or results.
• Think of areas of your life you might consider. For example, health, wealth, love, relationships, work, education, spiritual, etc. Use all the above techniques (1 to 3) in these areas and write down your list.

Men are dreaming animals, and the incapacity to dream makes a man less than human.  Irving Kristol

Dreams play an important role in life.  They provide a vision of the future to inspire, motivate and even plan. “A person with great dreams can achieve great things”.

Isn’t this obvious? Well, on the one hand it is. Many of the greatest people in this world have expressed having a strong vision of what they wanted to achieve and stuck to the task of achieving it. This implies that if you don’t dare to dream, you probably won’t achieve great things.

The world we are seeing today wasn’t created over night but it was a dream of some one. Each thing that we see, feel and touch today, be it a light bulb, fire, Television, Cell Phones, nuclear bombs etc, we dreamt of somewhere by someone.  From these dreams being realized, we are all now reaping the benefits.  So, if that is the power of dreams, then why are we so afraid of dreaming? Maybe it’s because we are not strong enough to face the failures that precede success.

Dreams are what cause us to bound out of bed in the morning instead of waking with anxiety or, even worse, apathy for the day ahead. When I don't have a dream in front of me it's easy to find fault with everything and self-pity comes easily. I've always enjoyed the quote from Walt Disney who said, "If you don't have a dream, how are you going to have a dream come true?"

I want to assure you that you are the very best at what you do - that’s being you.  Therefore, you deserve the best the world has to offer, don’t you? How then do you achieve your dreams?  Here is what you must do:

1.      Have goals. If you don’t know where you are going, you will never be able to take that first step. Your future is what you want it to be. Be like a kid, be creative and DARE to dream. Write down everything that comes out of your mind.

2.      Decide who you are today and who do you want to be in X number of years time. Having a time frame is important.

3.      Once a goal is decided and a time limit is committed to, write down your plan detailing how you are going to choose your path to success. 

4.      Read out your goals at least twice daily, right after you wake up and before you go to sleep.

5.      Visualise your goals clearly.  Hear the sounds you’ll hear when you succeed.  Feel and act ‘as if’ you've already achieved your dreams.

6.      Review your goals each week and amend what needs improvement.

7.      Become a powerful person by building hope into your life and share it with others. Doors open for these people.

8.      When you know for certain that you are about to realize your Dream set new goals or dreams. If you stop improving, you won't grow.  Except for our parents, you have the ability to choose each and everything else in our life.  So choose the type of life you want to live?

You were born to win.  In order to be the winner you were born to be, you've got to plan and prepare to win. Then, and only then, can you expect to win. Winning is not an accident, it happens as a result of a deliberate plan.

• Outcome goals can be set instead of performance goals. Where you are using outcome goals, and you fail to achieve the goal for reasons outside your control, this can be very dispiriting and can lead to loss of enthusiasm and feelings of failure. Always set performance goals.
  
• Goals can be set unrealistically high. When a goal is perceived to be unreachable, no effort will be made to achieve it. Set realistic goals.
  
• Conversely goals can be set so low that you feel no challenge or benefit in achieving the goal. Setting goals has been a waste of time. Always set goals that are challenging.
  
• Goals can be so vague that they are useless: it is difficult to know whether vague goals have been achieved. If achievement cannot be measured, then your self-confidence will not benefit from goal setting, nor can you observe progress towards a greater goal. Set precise, quantitative goals.
  
• Goal setting can be unsystematic, sporadic and disorganised. Here goals will be forgotten, achievement of goals will not be measured and feedback will not occur into new goals. The major benefits of goal setting have been lost. Be organised and regular in the way that you use goal setting.
  
• Too many goals may be set, leading to a feeling of overload. Remember that you deserve time to relax and enjoy being human.